What Do You Still Need To Let Go Of?

 

            There are two directions anything moving can flow - away from you or closer to you.  There may be a less than direct path within the actual movement of the object or energy, but there are only two directions that have any real meaning.  Is what you are focusing on flowing towards you or is it flowing away from you.  When we are talking about something that smells bad, the obvious hope is the smell is moving away from us….when we smell something lovely, well it's not rocket science here….

            For those who have been following me on this journey it's been pretty clear that almost everything I've loved or collected in the last several decades has been moving away from me.  Life has been a very long series of letting go - while this last year has been fairly intense, it's not been the only time I've had multiple and difficult losses in concentrated periods of time.

            But what has occurred to me these last few days is that it is time for me to enter the other side of this process, the part where I let what is next come into my life.  I've been thinking about getting a new dog now that my cat who didn't like dogs has left this plane of existence.  I promised him no more dog torture after my last dog died.  But now that he is gone, well, I've begun the process of being open to letting a new dog into our lives.

            Yesterday I visited an animal sanctuary with the goal of sharing a video with you (which will be coming soon!), but also as an opening to the new dog that may come to me.  This morning I was aware that I'm feeling conflict and fear about getting a new dog.  Yes, there is the responsibility, the work, the joy, and also the risk of my girl cat not getting along….but more than that I was aware that I was afraid of letting something new I loved in.

            I'm sad to report that it is much easier for me to let what I love go than it is for me to let love in.  My first dog was really the first time I truly let myself love and be loved.  Dogs are safe, loyal, never judge, and excellent givers of unconditional love - what love is meant to be.  Losing him was the most devastating thing I've ever experienced - and I've lost a LOT of people close to me, I mean a lot….but no one or no thing has ever compared to that moment in time.

            But one of the laws of this Universe is that it will not tolerate a vacuum.  When an opening occurs, something needs to fill it.  In my tiny trailer there's not much room for anyone else to join us physically, but energetically it's been feeling really empty.  My tiny boy cat filled that space, but with his death there is a vacuum that is asking to be filled.

            As a therapist who has worked with many around loss and grief, one of the issues people face in not wanting to let go of who they loved is the feeling that if they let go of the grief they are letting go of the one they loved.  They will choose their pain of what is gone over letting it go to let new love in.  While it is essential to honor the letting go and grief process, it is not meant to go on forever.

            I am not alone in losing most of my external and physical life.  But letting go is just part of what life is.  The real choice is will we then allow life to come back in?  This world is having to let go of a lot right now…the loss of the dream, the loss of the promise, the loss of money, security, stability…and more.  But that is just one part of the equation.  The more essential half of this process is what will you then let in?

            Here's a little secret I'll share with you as a reminder to my self as I consider letting a dog join us in the tiny trailer….love isn't something that goes anywhere.  The form may change, but love can't leave, it can only be denied or ignored.  No, it doesn't FEEL the same at first when the body and energy of who or what you loved is gone, but when you grieve the loss of that form, when you are ready - the love itself will be with you always.  That is the promise.

            But here's the secret….you can't stop giving your love and sharing it with others.  The only way to have love is to give it away, to share it, and to want it in your life.  No single person is going to save this world by their actions.  But as more and more of us let go of what is ready to pass away from this world in its form, we can then be open to love itself and from that love build a new world that will bless us all.  And what else could we really want for every animal, person, and planet?

            The mechanics of this Universe tells us that everything is energy and energy must move.  So, flow goes on with or without us directing it.  But it is my hope and wish for you in your life as it is in mine to let the fear flow away and the love flow in because there are many who need your love and none who need your fear - including you.  Disasters may come, but history has shown us that from the ashes often rises the beauty of human compassion and love.  We don't have to wait for big disasters or even little ones to let our love flow out so that more love can then flow in.

            I'll let you know about the dog -but until then remember no matter what happens you have choice.  You choose to let go and you choose to let in.  Which will you choose for your self today?